-By Frank Lovece

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Like the traditional James Bond movies, the Pink Panther films follow a series of trusty touchstones within each. After the original The Pink Panther in 1963, the series—initially conceived as a vehicle for David Niven as international playboy/thief The Phantom, rather than for the unexpectedly popular Peter Sellers as French Sûreté police inspector Jacques Clouseau—brought in such accoutrements as Clouseau's superior, Chief Inspector Dreyfus (the anti-M); martial-artist houseboy Cato, to whom a training-minded Clouseau gave standing orders to surprise-attack him; and, from film one, the equivalent of Bond Girls, featuring such international exotics as the Italian Claudia Cardinale, the French Capucine, the German Elke Sommer, the Hungarian Catherine Schell and now the Hindi Bollywood star Aishwarya Rai Bachchan.

If only the series, revamped as a family-audience vehicle for Steve Martin with the 2006 reboot The Pink Panther, had retained its unique mix of slapsticky urbanity. Instead, it appears to aim for the same crowd of youngsters as the similarly PG-rated Euro-romp Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties (2004), here with Emily Mortimer rather than Jennifer Love Hewitt as the hero's similarly chaste, first-crush love. Undiscriminating youngsters who like that cat tale will likely enjoy this one. Parents will just have to sit it out until one of three actually inspired scenes.

The first is when Clouseau, who on the strength of the previous film's exploits now leads a "dream team" of four international detectives and an author consultant, flashes back to a dinner in Rome with his smitten associate, Nicole Durant (Mortimer). A ceiling-high wine cabinet begins tipping precariously, and as bottles virtually leap out of their slots, Martin begins, essentially, a juggling-pin routine that quickly involves all the waiters, the maitre d' and some of the customers. It's a graceful bit with classic undertones, but, unfortunately, is less about physical skill than skillful editing. You pine wondering what a great juggler like the silent comic Fatty Arbuckle would have done with this, and without a single, cheating cut.

The other two bits take place during the team's investigation of the thefts of the Magna Carta, the Shroud of Turin, Japan's Imperial Sword, the Pope's ring and, of course, the priceless French gem The Pink Panther—by famed criminal The Tornado. Clouseau, his partner Ponton (Jean Reno), English inspector Pepperidge (Alfred Molina), Japanese investigator and computer whiz Kenji (Yuki Matsuzaki), Italian detective Vicenzo (Andy Garcia), and the Indian Sonia Solandres (Bachchan), author of a book on The Tornado, all visit the mansion of shady art dealer Avellaneda (Jeremy Irons). While Clouseau bumbles about, with some nice slapstick, in a bank of security monitors, the others try to keep Avellaneda distracted. The final funny scene involves Clouseau, recreating a theft, winding up in the Pope's clothes and giving his "blessing" from the balcony of St. Peter's.

Mostly, however, and despite star and co-writer Martin's own clear talent and likeability (I shudder to think of the similarly slapsticky Jim Carrey in the role), a dream team should be called in to investigate exactly how this all went wrong.